Why Bachelors Make Bad Decisions: Five Tips to Move from Reality Television to Your Career Change

The Bachelor is one of the many reality shows that have gripped the US television viewing audience.

Premise: A very eligible Bachelor (last season featured an NFL quarterback) stays in a mansion with several eligible young women. They seem to spend their days swimming, tanning, and speculating about the Bachelor's intentions. They meet the Bachelor in one-to-one and group activities. Each week the Bachelor gives a rose to the women who will continue to compete, and two who do not receive a rose go home. (If you're a more faithful viewer than I am, please email me with corrections!)

So what can we learn about career reality from this reality show?

1. Walk out the front door of your comfort zone.

From the women's perspective, The Bachelor is a metaphor for the wrong kind of job hunting. Whenever you're one of a group chasing the same dream, it's difficult to create a realistic game plan and use energy efficiently. But they're chosen to compete and it's so easy to get caught up in the game.

Career changers, of course, aren't stuck in a mansion with a single prize, however dazzling. Like the contestants, though, they can get awfully comfortable. Better to walk out the front door and keep looking until you recognize your true goal and the ink is dry on the offer letter.

2. Prepare for irrational rejection.

If you choose to stay and compete, remember that the decision-maker is looking for reasons to eliminate options because there are just too many choices to evaluate rationally. Interviewers overwhelmed by hundreds of resumes often can find an adequate choice from the first fifty ­ or from any fifty chosen at random. You can't read anything into rejection except the laws of probability and randomness.

3. Look through the windows: there's a world outside!

When you're caught up in an intense contest, it's easy to forget there's more than one race in the world and certainly more than one prize. And I believe everyone should pursue multiple goals at the same time. It sounds time-consuming, but usually you can achieve synergies by creative planning. You learn how to pursue one goal by striving after another. And most important, you're likely to come out a winner.

4. Recognize that choices look different when you're on deadline.

From the Bachelor's perspective, there are pluses and minuses to this series of forced decisions. First, it's easy to procrastinate when you face a tough decision. A deadline often clarifies options and actually makes the choice easier. But when you're facing a complex decision with consequences that last for years, where a mistake can be costly, it's best to take more time.

5. Don't anticipate the final decision until the ink is dry on the contract.

Nothing happens until you get the offer in writing. In one episode, the Bachelor took two different finalists to the same jewelry store to look at engagement rings! Even after you've looked at rings together, the show seems to say, you're not even engaged to be engaged. (We won't go into the ethical dimensions of these actions in the context of romance. But would you want to accept a rose ­ or a ring ­ from someone who just went through the same process with a different potential partner?)

I've heard first-hand accounts of verbal offers that were withdrawn or materially changed by the time they were translated to writing. And even written offers can be withdrawn for sufficient reason. During times of stress, people make promises they don't intend to keep, and others hear promises that were never intended to go beyond light banter.

Bottom Line: It's no accident that Bachelor match-ups seem to fall apart when the season ends. And it's no accident that great decisions lead to empowering, satisfying, meaningful lives.

I offer one-to-one consultations on career and business strategy.

About The Author

Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and career/business consultant, helping midlife professionals take their First step to a Second Career. http://www.cathygoodwin.com.

"Ten secrets of mastering a major life change" mailto:subscribe@cathygoodwin.com

Contact: cathy@cathygoodwin.com 505-534-4294

---

Seven Steps to Making a Successful Career Change

My first job was secretary to Moses. Having to transcribe... Read More

Petite Modeling: is There a Career for You?

PEtite modeling is a tough industry to break into. Especially... Read More

Dissatisfied With Work? Perhaps Its You

Just about every month, there's a new research report detailing... Read More

Closing the Gap on Your Career Goals

If you still picture a steady progression up the ladder... Read More

Job Interviews: Succeeding With Panel Interviews

These days, job interviews often consist of a panel of... Read More

How To Find A Job As A Copy Editor

Jobs for copy editors may seem like they are hard... Read More

Focus On White-Collar Crime: Accounting Fraud and Computer Crimes Creates Need; Qualified Investing

An epidemic of white-collar financial crime has resulted in the... Read More

Recruiting Excellent Job Candidates

An independent recruiter, recruiting agency or executive search firm is... Read More

Managing Emotions During Career Change and Job Search, Part Two

Half the battle in successfully managing your emotions during a... Read More

A Career in Image Consulting

You might have seen them while watching TV shows such... Read More

How to Terminate an Employee and Live to Tell the Tale

1. Employee Backdrop in AustraliaThe whole arena of Industrial Relations... Read More

Job Interview Mistakes To Avoid

By avoiding these 8 simple mistakes, you can improve your... Read More

Do You Work to Live or Live to Work?

Let's be realistic here - hands up all of you... Read More

What You Should Never Put on Your Resume

Liars Get Caught! What NOT to Put on Your Resume"Everybody... Read More

How To Get A Job Fast

In today's unpredictable economy, the idea of job security with... Read More

During Midlife Change: Are You a Jumper or a Clinger?

Over the years, I have identified two kinds of midlife... Read More

Those Little Things

Moving to another state meant finding a new dentist. I... Read More

Invest in Your Career Change--Put Your Money Where Your Dream Is

You say you want a new career, you say you... Read More

3 Reasons To Hire From Outside Your Industry

While at times it may prove comfortable and convenient to... Read More

The Role of a Medical Assistant in a Modern Medical Practice

Many physicians are unsure of what tasks are appropriate to... Read More

Overcoming Inertia in Job Change

If you can hold on to an optimistic belief in... Read More

Resurrecting the Perfect Resume, Part Two

Are you in denial about the lifelessness of your resume?... Read More

What is Absolutely the Best Day to go on a Job Interview?

First of all, to fully understand and appreciate the answer,... Read More

How to Improve Your Work Situation

buWhy are so many people unhappy in their work situation?... Read More

Job Hunting Tips: Accepting Judgment

Applying for work is stressful, no matter the circumstances. Even... Read More