|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
I must confess, I laughed when I saw that Maria Shriver has come out with a book called, "Ten Things I Wish I Had Known Before Going Into The Real World." The real world? Come on, she grew up a Kennedy and married the biggest action movie star of all time! That aside, it got me to thinking: What are ten things I wish I would have known before going out into the real world? So, here they are...
Life isn't fair. You know, your mother always told you this but as kids we never believe it. We think that somehow mom was two tacos short of a combo plate and that eventually we will go into the real world and show her how those who work hard and do right always do come out on top. Then after about five years we become disenchanted and start to smell the coffee. Life isn't fair! Why didn't anybody tell me that? I guess they did, didn't they? Unfortunately, sometimes the bad guys wins. Sometimes people die early. We shouldn't take this lightly, but we must be realists. While we accept what comes our way, we still strive to work hard, dream big, and do right.
People play favorites. It is true that it isn't what you know but who you know that counts. This is because people play favorites. Sometimes it doesn't matter that you are the best person or have the lowest bid. People will regularly cut deals with people they like or who can scratch their back in return. I guess the lesson to learn is that while we strive to achieve much and have excellent skills, we should also develop a strong network of healthy relationships.
People will let you down. Being a person who does what he says can be a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing because I am able to look at myself in the mirror each day. It is a curse because if you are like that, you will most likely expect that from others and yet they will regularly let you down. People can be bad at keeping their word or doing what is right. I could have relieved a lot of emotional stress if I would have known this one before getting out into the real world.
Not everybody wants to grow personally. I just assumed that everybody loved to learn and to grow. I thought everybody wanted to get better at what they did. The reality is, however, that most people do not. That is why there is something that we call "average." Most people want to stay where they are. That is why they do. Those who strive to go forward will always be cutting against the grain and will often be resented, even if quietly, for it.
The stock market goes down sometimes. Some of you older folks knew this. But us young whippersnappers, we have been riding it high on the hog for a while. This is good in a sense, but unless you have some common sense of how financial markets work, you can get quite a shock from time to time. You see, before you get into the real world, everything gets handed to you and you really don't have to work for much. Then you do and you think that every investment will turn out grand - whoops!
The older you get, the harder it is to lose weight. I was always a little "pudgy." Nothing big, just not like the cover guys of Men's Health Magazine (You know, the ones that say "Six-pack abs in 20 minutes a day." I think that means they only eat twenty minutes a day, and it is usually stewed vegetables! But I digress...). If I would have known better, I would have worked harder when I was younger to keep the weight off so I wouldn't have to work that much harder now!
Marriage is work. A good marriage is more work. When you are young you think, "I'll find the girl of my dreams and we'll live happily ever after." Well, hello! You forget that your spouse is human and you are too, most of the time! To live under the same roof with someone and to work out likes and dislikes, personalities, and schedules, not to mention life goals and the like is HARD WORK! Not drudgery, just work. Yes, there will be plenty of bliss and joy, but marriage will make you work for it!
It takes longer to get out of debt than to get into it. I have never really had much debt. I did take out student loans to pay for school and wow, do they take a long time to get out of. Fortunately I have them paid off but for a while there, it was one of the big checks we wrote every month. Many people think credit cards are great because they can have what they want when they want it. Too bad they don't realize that twenty minutes of shopping ecstasy will result in months or years of payments.
It doesn't work to try to please others. I have always wanted people to like me. Many times, I wanted them to like me too much. That isn't good. This doesn't work because I realized that most of the time, people liking or disliking you has nothing to do whatsoever with rational thought. Some people will dislike you, no matter how well you have done, and others will love you, warts and all. So I do my best and let the chips fall where they may - now.
You need to tend to your spiritual, emotional, and physical health or you will crash hard. If you don't take time for yourself, both inwardly and outwardly, your body will catch up with you. You can take time for yourself by choice or not. It is much more fun by choice! Life is hard and it can and will weigh you down. We need to tend the fires of spirit and mind while keeping our physical bodies tuned for success as well. If not, our bodies break down.
Bonus: In spite of the above, life is very much worth it! Some of the above may seem like bummers. They aren't the "positive" things we like to focus on, but they are true. Being positive doesn't mean sticking your head in the ground in order to avoid the negative of life. What it means is that we are realists who understand the negative aspects of life and choose to be optimists instead. We deal with the negative and pursue the positive. That is why I can say that life is worth living no matter how expensive or painful the lessons I have had to learn have been. Life is good and I can make it better!
So I had to learn some lessons AFTER I got into the real world. So what? At least I learned them and can live the rest of my life to the fullest from now on! I hope you can too!
About The Author:
Chris Widener is a popular speaker and writer as well as the President of Made for Success, a company helping individuals and organizations turn their potential into performance, succeed in every area of their lives and achieve their dreams.
To see Chris "live" at the upcoming Jim Rohn Weekend Event as he speaks on the subject of Secrets of Influence go to http://Chris-Widener.InspiresYOU.com/ or call 800-929-0434.



Wind Chimes and more... The fall harvest comes upon us once a year. The... Read More Being a coach is such a rewarding profession. The enormous... Read More In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on... Read More Today an increasing number of us are experiencing burnout, low... Read More The surprising answer is "probably". Most individuals don't realize that... Read More I'm a relationship coach and, unlike most, I deal with... Read More Over the years I've worked with very many coaches and... Read More You Are What You Listen ToCan music really help you... Read More During a recent coaching session with Mark, I was briefly... Read More Every one of us have dreams, desires and goals that... Read More One of the ironies of mindfulness is that it's still... Read More Can you recall a time where you utilized silence to... Read More As a Life Coach I quickly identified most individuals wanted... Read More One of the most distressing observations I have made among... Read More Spirituality coaching is more than creating goals and holding someone... Read More What do you do when fear shows up? Do you... Read More Sometimes life can seem like one long series of unsolvable... Read More We've all been through training events-workshops, seminars, and courses that... Read More We are frequently held back from making future plans or... Read More The scenario?The company has decided it needs to eliminate costs.... Read More 1. If What You Are Doing Is Not Working Change... Read More More and more people have less and less time, but... Read More Life coaching has become fashionable in recent years and there... Read More (Channelled)Roy?I am sending you this quote from Sōtō Zen, Dōgen's... Read More When was the last time you did some dedicated physical... Read More
Windchimes
for great gifts!
The Harvest: Shared Power
What Do You Really Want ?
Every Obstacle Always Presents an Opportunity
Six Steps for Creating Work-Life Balance
Could You and Your Business Benefit from a Business Coach or a Consultant?
You Have A Choice
Is Time Really Easier to Sell than Products? Generate Extra Revenue by Packaging Up What You Know
Increase Your Intelligence With Music
Get Out What You Put In!
Drop and Gimme Ten!
Tripping On Mindfulness
Theres Gold in that Silence
Whats Wrong with Life Coaching?
Helping Relationships: Understanding the Helpee
9 Guidelines For Spiritual Coaching
Fear Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of!
Difficult Challenges? -- What If?
Executive Coaching and Effective Learning
A Fresh Look at the Choices We Make
Managing Performance Every Day
3 Secrets to Developing Superior People Skills
Is Coaching For You?
Life Coach, Counsellor, or Therapist; - How do I choose?
The Right Time and Place
How to Give Yourself a Check Up From the Neck Up
You, like many others, may have come to this article... Read More
Many of you reading this will be running businesses, or... Read More
Did you know that the area that you call your... Read More
"Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly... Read More
Would you agree that today most of us have the... Read More
I hope you are sitting down as you read this!... Read More
Terms like Postpartum, Post Traumatic and Post Gulf War are... Read More
Direct Answers - Column for the week of July 22,... Read More
Being a lifelong student, I am regularly attending seminars etc.... Read More
Judging by the extraordinarily positive reader response to Po Bronson's... Read More
As the title states, "Become an Information Filter and a... Read More
Recently, I worked with a client who was having a... Read More
Every 12 months, as the New-Year rolls around, we all... Read More
Watching the news can be hazardous to your health.It's a... Read More
What's the alternative to making decisions?Allowing someone else, or circumstances,... Read More
'Have you read the Art of War?' someone asked me... Read More
Imagine yourself as the only means of financially supporting you.... Read More
Do you find yourself striving upward in life yet making... Read More
I think that we're all probably familiar with the fairground... Read More
When did you last do that? When did you last... Read More
It does make you wonder sometimes, doesn't it? You know... Read More
When you invest your time in being a mentee you... Read More
Having a mentor can mean the difference between success and... Read More
Improve Your Life! How to Hire A Coach.A reader writes,... Read More
I'm working on a coach training certification, and one of... Read More
Coaching |