Missing The Bus

As a step daughter and step grand daughter, I followed the examples that were set for me years before when I became a step parent. The way my stepson finally came to love and respect me as his step mother, was through all of the "trying" experiences we had. Excuse the pun, but raising kids is a very trying experience!

One of the first times my stepson "tried" or tested my word and consistency was over catching the school bus. Nick was not a morning person and that made getting up in time for school in the morning a problem. Myself having lunches to pack, and two other kids who were already responsible for getting themselves up, Nick knew that I expected him to do his thing in the morning. When he missed the bus the first time, I informed him that I would drive him to school that one time, and one time only!

Just a couple of weeks later on another early school morning, I could tell Nick was going to miss the bus if he didn't move a lot faster and told him so. I left it at that, went about my business, and sure enough Nick came to me with a sorrowful look on his face saying that he had missed the bus. I said, "You had better get your rollerblades on then or you will be late for the start of school!" Nick was incredulous and asked if I was sure I could not take him to school, and I told him that he got his one and only ride the first time he missed the bus and he better get a move on.

His next excuse was that he was going to be all sweaty if he had to blade all the way to school (about 4 miles), and I told him to take an extra shirt. When next I saw him, he was sitting on the curb in front of our house lacing his skates up, shirt off, back pack at the ready and I watched him skate off down the road with a smile on my face.

He had just experienced the result of testing my consistency as a step parent and found that it was the same as my habit with my biological kids! Whether they know it or not, all kids feel safe, special, and protected when rule is consistently applied.

Sandy Williams, Life Coach at International Stepfamily Foundation, member of Stepfamily Association of America & founder of http://www.stepfamilysuccess.com

In The News:

table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.proudparenting.com/node/2139cid=1255938590ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNFYMheAaesr13jJGCRl7R3tZXVYKwimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=hqC8h-pAbV8Jimgurl=www.proudparenting.com/files/foster345.jpg width=80 height=64 alt= border=1brfont size=-2Proud Parenting/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.arkansasnews.com/archive/2008/10/10/News/348353.htmlcid=1255938590ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNGwxbu-oHqBFEK7ws8bMoKrPfHihwDHS to drop ban on foster bparenting/b by unwed couples/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fArkansas News,nbsp;ARnbsp;-/font nobr5 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1quot;Everyone we#39;ve talked to in the foster care system, whether it#39;s the workers at DCFS (the Division of Children and Family Services), whether it#39;s bparents/b, b.../b/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://newsok.com/arkansas-to-allow-foster-parenting-for-unmarried-same-sex-couples/article/3309580cid=1255938590ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNEOsTzVPSsvhFfiJeqdGnuGRL_7XAArkansas to allow foster bparenting/b for unmarried, same-sex couples/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrNewsOK.com/nobr/font/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.arktimes.com/Articles/ArticleViewer.aspx%3FArticleID%3Dbe6ae730-42c3-4b4e-afd8-13c6e6cce0accid=1255938590ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNH7rxRVaWG2kxcsRAGOaHjS0GWE7gEverybody loved Mike/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrArkansas Times/nobr/font/fontbrfont class=p size=-1a class=p href=http://news.google.com/news?sourceid=navclientie=ISO-8859-1rls=GGLG,GGLG:2005-22,GGLG:enncl=1255938590hl=ennobrall 180 news articles/nobr/a/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfgate/detail%3Fblogid%3D29%26entry_id%3D31289cid=1255903959ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNE159oV8Gz2llYYgAa0XIHRLe4Mtwimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=N3kefsPQZ04Jimgurl=www.sfgate.com/blogs/images/sfgate/parenting/2008/10/09/barry190x271.jpg width=56 height=80 alt= border=1brfont size=-2San Francisco Chronicle/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfgate/detail%3Fblogid%3D29%26entry_id%3D31289cid=1255903959ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNE159oV8Gz2llYYgAa0XIHRLe4MtwYour bparenting/b happy place/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fSan Francisco Chronicle,nbsp; USAnbsp;-/font nobrOct 9, 2008/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1When the bad times come, one thing I do to keep from getting out-of-control upset is remember one of my bparenting/b happy places. I have maybe five or six of b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi%3Ff%3D/c/a/2008/10/09/EDLO13EDO9.DTLcid=1254438696ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNGj3XZ1hqzT_LtKOtIG1viI-hp8EgWho claims the family policy agenda?/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fSan Francisco Chronicle,nbsp; USAnbsp;-/font nobr15 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1High rates of poverty, divorce, single parenthood and social isolation exaggerate the typical strains of bparenting/b. As a result, the United States has one b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.charlescitypress.com/articles/2008/10/10/news/news09.txtcid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNEIUWRPpABWnAlrjEw9LcR9oxT2TgbParenting/b video series begins this Sunday/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fCharles City Press,nbsp; United Statesnbsp;-/font nobr1 hour ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1A great bparenting/b resource is being offered to interested families in Charles City. The first five segments of the video series, “Shepherding a Child’s b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.canada.com/calgaryherald/story.html%3Fid%3Dde764b0d-5717-4763-90c1-1e0a6114b5e7cid=1255419503ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNE5WuRA_oTl_rnn04fobpXpDvI7yQimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=RMSuqQhUIngJimgurl=a123.g.akamai.net/f/123/12465/1d/media.canada.com/idl/cahr/20070226/169270-53492.jpg%3Fsize%3Dl width=80 height=80 alt= border=1brfont size=-2Calgary Herald/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/parenting/detail%3F%26entry_id%3D31279cid=1255419503ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNHhwH3p0xUijuwZmHnpThn-F2h27AbParenting/b books you can#39;t live without/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fSan Francisco Chronicle,nbsp; USAnbsp;-/font nobrOct 8, 2008/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1In my bedroom there is a bookshelf where I#39;ve kept bparenting/b-related books I#39;ve collected over the years, and I realized recently it#39;s time to get rid of b.../b/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.canada.com/calgaryherald/story.html%3Fid%3Dde764b0d-5717-4763-90c1-1e0a6114b5e7cid=1255419503ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNE5WuRA_oTl_rnn04fobpXpDvI7yQA kinder way to discipline kids/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrCalgary Herald/nobr/font/fontbrfont class=p size=-1a class=p href=http://news.google.com/news?sourceid=navclientie=ISO-8859-1rls=GGLG,GGLG:2005-22,GGLG:enncl=1255419503hl=ennobrall 4 news articles/nobr/a/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.canada.com/vancouversun/news/story.html%3Fid%3D7fbc9b87-5851-4062-b62a-3ed817b03342cid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNHrUZqaWh4ibjeHqgCMT-EiUroxMwimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=OcvMj0_nK5sJimgurl=a123.g.akamai.net/f/123/12465/1d/media.canada.com/4bffca32-8393-4582-a216-f2db7777bafd/fordfocus06.jpg%3Fsize%3Dl width=80 height=80 alt= border=1brfont size=-2Vancouver Sun/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.greatdad.com/tertiary/274/3201/new-car-technology-to-aid-parenting-skills.htmlcid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNGAoTS3CRP-rt809LM6FFwGSsVLDANew car technology to aid bparenting/b skills/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fGreat Dad,nbsp;Californianbsp;-/font nobrOct 8, 2008/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1There’s also a low-fuel warning which kicks in at 75 miles to empty - in case your children ignore your wise bparenting/b advice and spend more time reveling b.../b/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.minotdailynews.com/page/content.detail/id/519728.html%3Fnav%3D5004cid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNER-GwCsdPjhm-a8JncHRZv0xg_ggbParenting/b and technology — is it protection or control?/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrMinot Daily News/nobr/font/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://blogs.pcworld.com/staffblog/archives/007890.htmlcid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNFnwiyka4_uY4TlmCBz4Nnsxcy_GAMyKey Turns Your Ford Focus into Your Mom/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrPC World/nobr/font/fontbrfont size=-1a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/3147296/Parents-to-control-how-fast-children-drive.htmlcid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNFOe-xc8NPIBq71uDbXgQ-O2Wwo_gbParents/b to control how fast children drive/a font size=-1 color=#6f6f6fnobrTelegraph.co.uk/nobr/font/fontbrfont size=-1 class=pa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.techradar.com/news/world-of-tech/car-tech/ford-launches-mykey-parental-controls-for-cars-474055cid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNG6tNU24zYAKIti5hxjKM4WY4hWGAnobrTechRadar.com/nobr/anbsp;- a href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/10/07/young-at-the-wheel-and-at-risk/%3Fhpcid=1254838181ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNGo1kaZk5BeKYCF-0fwH_3ZSsG4gwnobrNew York Times/nobr/a/fontbr/font class=p size=-1a class=p href=http://news.google.com/news?sourceid=navclientie=ISO-8859-1rls=GGLG,GGLG:2005-22,GGLG:enncl=1254838181hl=ennobrall 905 news articles/nobr/a/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/1584242/a_parenting_odyssey_shouldering_grief_welcoming_joy/cid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNHlZJIh3MVLykcZaZNtpxlwusKayAA bParenting/b Odyssey: Shouldering Grief, Welcoming Joy/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fRedOrbit,nbsp;TXnbsp;-/font nobr10 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1Before we could grow accustomed to being the bparents/b of a daughter, we learned that we would lose her. Imagine the highest and lowest moment of your life b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/parenting/detail%3F%26entry_id%3D31330cid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNEfgHhhlfyJTMMcWyb0C8yDlePzSAimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=AqzLL5bUmQ4Jimgurl=www.sfgate.com/blogs/images/sfgate/parenting/2008/10/09/Clements_Children140x200.JPG width=56 height=80 alt= border=1brfont size=-2San Francisco Chronicle/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/parenting/detail%3F%26entry_id%3D31330cid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNEfgHhhlfyJTMMcWyb0C8yDlePzSAQamp;A: 49ers cornerback Nate Clements/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fSan Francisco Chronicle,nbsp; USAnbsp;-/font nobr6 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1So what does this have to do with bparenting/b? In a random sideline interview a few games ago, Clements started gushing about his two children, b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.redorbit.com/news/health/1584241/parenting_and_professing_in_cancers_shadow/cid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNEs40KpcAHA_8m-YM2jf6cXuvZCbwbParenting/b and Professing in Cancer#39;s Shadow/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fRedOrbit,nbsp;TXnbsp;-/font nobr10 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1I always felt tension between doing my brain job (teaching) and doing my heart job (bparenting/b). This tension between bparenting/b and professing has been b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
table border=0 width= valign=top cellpadding=2 cellspacing=7trtd width=80 align=center valign=topfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifa href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.examiner.com/x-608-Early-Childhood-Parenting-Examiner~y2008m10d9-Parenting-challenges--What-happens-when-mom--dad-are-deaf-but-the-kids-can-hearcid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNH42cgF1HRhOhSagwNj6sDGOQAuggimg src=http://news.google.com/news?imgefp=Z2_r71z3U8sJimgurl=www.examiner.com/images/blog/author/img165angele_sionna_photo.jpg width=80 height=67 alt= border=1brfont size=-2Examiner.com/font/a/font/tdtd valign=top class=jfont style=font-size:85%;font-family:arial,sans-serifbrdiv style=padding-top:0.8em;img alt= height=1 width=1/divdiv class=lha href=http://www.citywebshopper.net/articles/includes/redirect.php?url=http://www.examiner.com/x-608-Early-Childhood-Parenting-Examiner~y2008m10d9-Parenting-challenges--What-happens-when-mom--dad-are-deaf-but-the-kids-can-hearcid=0ei=u6jvSKPgDaTe6AOKt83CBwusg=AFQjCNH42cgF1HRhOhSagwNj6sDGOQAuggbParenting/b challenges - What happens when mom amp; dad are deaf but b.../b/abrfont size=-1font color=#6f6f6fExaminer.comnbsp;-/font nobr16 hours ago/nobr/fontbrfont size=-1by Angele Sionna, Early Childhood bParenting/b Examiner The new episode of Super Nanny (which airs Friday at 9/8c) features a family with deaf bparents/b and b.../b/font/div/font/td/tr/table
parenting - Google News

10 Things You Can Do To Help A Shy Child

There are a few points about shyness in children which... Read More

Parenting Your Teenager: Of Course You Can Search Your Teens Room

Q. We recently caught our son smoking pot, and we... Read More

How Two Quarelling Kids Helped Invent the Better Behavior Wheel

When David was nine and Laura was twelve, the battles... Read More

How Effective Are Ritalin and Dexedrine in Treating the Symptoms of ADHD?

Many research studies have shown the overall effectiveness of stimulant... Read More

Kids: Channeling Mania Towards Productivity

More and more kids these days are diagnosed ADD, ADHD,... Read More

Choosing a Daycare or Pre-School ? Top Ten Safety Tips

When it's time to put your child into a daycare... Read More

Getting through the School Daze

It's back to school time again. Does the thought of... Read More

Cooking With Your Kids Helps Develop Motor Skills for Preschoolers

Did you know that cooking with your kids is a... Read More

Guide to Choosing Plush Toys for Children

Many people consider plush toys great for children. They say... Read More

Book Review: The Ring Bear Depicts Turmoil of Becoming A Stepchild

In "The Ring Bear," a picture book by Tigard resident... Read More

Pieces of Time and Pivotal Moments

Life is comprised of pieces of time sprinkled with pivotal... Read More

The Child Chef

If you really want to get your children to eat... Read More

Parents Need to Vent Anger! Try These 4 Steps to Serenity

Parents are losing their self-control to anger. A friend called... Read More

How Fathers Can Step Up to Fathering

When our oldest son was 2, my wife went out... Read More

Send the Kids Outside!

Think back to your own childhood. Chances are, some of... Read More

Tips For a First-Time Dad

So you're going to become a father. Now is not... Read More

The Metamorphosis of The Brain: Raising Your child to be a Brainiac

The human brain never actually stops developing. Beginning formation in... Read More

The ADHD Parents Guide: Questions for the School

Here is something that you might want to keep if... Read More

Coping with the Stress of Moving Home and Childrens Concerns

Moving house can be an emotional experience for adults, so... Read More

Planning the Ultimate Kid Birthday Party

Child Party Planning Guideline #1)Pick the ThemeYour child is going... Read More

Hold a Childs Birthday Party for Charity

As a parent, you probably know that the birthday party... Read More

Raising Teenagers? Stay C.A.L.M.

Parents of teenagers frequently ask what can be done to... Read More

Making Internet Chat Safe For Your Children

No matter what you say or do, your kids will... Read More

Calming Tips for Hyperactive Children

Parents of hyperactive children know the "Would you please just... Read More

Fraternal Twin Parenting Concerns

Identity and Your Fraternal TwinFor the most part, throughout this... Read More